Being a good person

       What makes a good person? Is it your job, or car? Not in my opinion. I often self evaluate, and some times overcompensate for who I thought I should be. or where I could be. But all in all its your morals and values that define you. Not your cloths, or hair. These are just things we often use to attempt to portray and illusion of whom we feel we are.  I used to be a huge goof when it came to self portrayal. Lost at 17 after my fathers sudden death, and spending almost 3 years locked in a boy's home, while my parents fought a nasty custody battle, my dad was gone. After his suicide I went through a good 60 fazes. I was a goth, punk,emo,gangster,stoner,jock,christian,Muslim, just for the short list. I felt I had to brand myself in order to be a good person, you must need friends. Oh and need I add must be popular. I felt this was the path to success and being a good person. I never even fathomed that possibly being a good person meant making good decisions. Or that by making a difference and sticking to my plans that would lead me to a better path and being a good person. Being a good person isent about what you have or who you know. Its about the example you set, the goals you meet and the promises you keep.

Question myself

 As a father I often question myself. I'm still scared, still over consumed with mere  experience, and the fear of failing what should I do? I already have the feelings of not being good enough, or that I may not be what my daughter will think I should. I'm a great person, A caring person. But often clout my self with self doubt, and reasons why I can not succeed. This is a major set back for me. I have the inability to decipher positive from negative a lot of the time. See growing up in a single parent home was never easy, I know people have had it a lot worse than me. I just often feel as if I may fail as a parent, or somehow become my father. I set myself up to succeed but fear failure more than anything. Why do parents fail? How can this be resolved? And what if I do not fail but my daughter takes the wrong turn anyway?